Fondly remembered and deeply missed

"He was a bright man who made bad puns and verbal quips, injected trivia, big words and foreign phrases into his teaching, joked about popular culture, politics, the world around us. No one like this had entered my orbit before, and I was transfixed by both his intelligence and his obvious love for his profession." — from an assignment for EDSE 504, July 2006

There are no words.

L

How Social Media Will Contribute to the Erasure of History

Have you ever looked up one of your favourite musicians or actors on Wikipedia? Was that person ever involved in any sort of criminal activity (for instance, spousal battering)? If so, chances are the celebrity's PR people are actively monitoring the Internet to ensure that any references to that criminal activity, whether proved in court or not, are absent.

Say you were a relatively important Seventies folk-rock singer. Say you were involved in the 1980s with a beautiful, talented, well-known actress. Say your relationship ended and subsequently allegations of domestic assault arose. Could it be possible that you, formerly important musician, have enough resources to sue the allegations out of existence, and to ensure that these allegations (now "retracted") stay extinguished? Even to the point of ensuring that your PR handlers tell journalists foolishly seeking to interview you NOT to raise "The Thing"?

Well, ha, Mr Formerly Famous Musician. Ha. I may like your music, but you personally just may be a waste of skin as a human being.

The Insomnia Defence

The Best Health blog reports today that "A study done by business school professors and published in the Academy of Management Journal that looked at the behaviour [of] sleep-deprived students and nurses found that those who lacked sufficient shut-eye increased bad behaviour such as rudeness, inappropriate responses and even stealing."

This explains a great deal, I think!

Sleepy and surly,
L

Outraged, again

According to an article in this morning's Edmonton Journal, Helena Guergis' abrupt dismissal from the federal cabinet and Conservative Party of Canada last year was "an employee–employer relationship" issue.

Strange, that. This is Canada, where MPs serve not at the pleasure of the prime minister but at the will of the Canadian public.

Perhaps the prime minister in question forgot that point.

According to the article, Guergis' error was that "she didn't come clean with her employer," according to the private detective who made the allegations against Guergis.

There was no reason I would have voted for the CPC anyway, but this item adds to the mountain of evidence condemning the Harper government as secretive, petty, and autocratic.

An MP is accountable to the people of her constituency. The people employ her — or fire her. The prime minister's heavy-handed tactics in this matter, based on vague and still-unproved allegations, compromised Canadian democracy.

But then that's hardly unusual for this administration, is it?

It's been a bad week, Mr Harper. I hope the next two are even worse.

Looking forward to the day Harper is no longer in power,
L

Politics: No thinking allowed

So CBC reports that Stephen Harper is pledging to eliminate the deficit a year earlier than planned: here

How? Magic!

Seriously, if he could eliminate the deficit a year earlier than planned — a deficit HIS government created and a debt-elimination timetable that HIS budget introduced — then why didn't HIS government do so this year?

Makes me wonder. But then I read this.

Oh. That's the magic. Huh.

L

What my FB status should be...

... is "so tired of the bullsh*t". Hrmph.

Capturing synecdoche and hyperbole in an anecdote

Or, there is no antidote for antimetabole.

Or, as scholar Jila Ghomeshi remarks, "You can't always look at a word and know how to pronounce it and you can't always hear a word and know how to spell it. Mastering English spelling is a spectacular feat of memorization."

Something to think about as I write my chapter (number six!) on readers, writers, and the language arts as social processes.

L

Leonard Cohen reminds me of E.E. Cummings

From "The Great Divide"

And when I gathered up to leave
You drew me to your side
To be as Adam was to Eve
Before the Great Divide

And fastened here we cannot move
Except to one another
We spread and drown as lilies do
From nowhere to the centre

And here I cannot lift a hand
To trace the lines of beauty
But lines are traced and love is glad
To come and go so freely

And here no sin can be confessed
No sinner be forgiven
It's written that the law must rest
Before the law is written

And here the silence is erased
The background all dismantled
Your beauty cannot be compared
No mirror here, no shadow ...

Note the feminine ("almost") rhymes, B!

L

Blogger doesn't recognize less than three

MCMLXXXIII.

RIP. IOU. BRB.

L

My hope for the world

If I could teach students, writers, and copyeditors only one thing, it might be this: the past tense of lead (verb, pronounced LEED: to guide others by going in advance of) is led, not lead (noun, pronounced LED: a soft grey metal). I see this error made so commonly that I'm starting to doubt that the distinction is correct (but it is: I checked!).

Professional editors should not make this mistake. But perhaps I am a lone voice in this particular language wilderness.

Sighfully,
L

Toward the new year

From "It Won't Take Long" (as performed by Indigo Girls; original lyrics by Ferron)

...oh beware you sagging diplomats
for you will not hear one gun
and though our homes be torn and ransacked
we will not be undone
for as we let ourselves be bought
we're gonna let ourselves be free
and if you think we stand alone
take a look around and you will see

we are children in the rafters
we are babies in the park
we are lovers at the movies
we are candles in the dark
we are changes in the weather
we are snowflakes in july
we are women grown together
we are men who easily cry
we are words not quickly spoken
we're the deeper side of try
we are dreamers in the making
we are not afraid of why

Ah.

Snowbound,
L

What Book Am I?

Took a quiz to find out what book I am. Here is the result:

You're The Dictionary!
by Merriam-Webster
You're one of those know-it-all types, with an amazing amount of knowledge at your command. People really enjoy spending time with you in very short spurts, but hanging out with you for a long time tends to bore them. When folks really need an authority to refer to, however, you're the one they seek. You're an exceptional speller and very well organized.

Wow! I'm amazed.

Want to take the book quiz yourself? Go here. Enjoy!

Procrastination!

Nothing adds to putting off the inevitable like a joke...

Q. What's a dyslexic agnostic insomniac?
A. Someone who lies awake all night wondering if there really is a dog.

L,
wondering whether she in fact knows a dyslexic agnostic insomniac

I think I can; I think I can...

This comic describes exactly the state of my life right now.

Love PhD Comics!

L

An aphorism ...

... demonstrating rhetorical schemes ...

"Do you have what you need? Do you need what you have?"

L

Happy Thanksgiving!

Here's hoping it's wonderful for everyone.

L

(And is there anything as satisfying as shredding documents for an hour?!? woot!)

I hear a lot of stories; I suppose they could be true

What to believe: what one says or what one does? After all, I have faith; I just want proof...

Very very tired,
L

Brer Rabbit Days

As a wise man once wrote, "I could be bounded in a nutshell, and count myself a king of infinite space, were it not that I have bad dreams." Or, to put it another way: "You cannot, sir, take from me anything that I will more willingly part withal..."

Hmm.


"Landslide"

I took my love and I took it down,
Climbed a mountain and turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
'Til the landslide brought it down

Oh, mirror in the sky, What is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?
I don't know, I don't know

Well, I've been afraid of changing
Because I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder,
Even children get older
And I'm getting older, too

So, take my love, take it down
Climb a mountain and turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well, the landslide will bring it down
The landslide will bring it down...

Musicians Are Bossy

The other night, B observed that there are many songs that instruct listeners "don't" do something. Being who I am, I wanted to know how many songs in my iTunes would demonstrate the concept. Here's the list (and there are others that I know but don't own). — L


Don't Ask Me No Questions - Lynyrd Skynyd
Don't Ask Me Why - Billy Joel
Don't Ask Me Why - Eurythmics
Don't Be Cruel - Cheap Trick
Don't Be Lonely - Quarterflash
Don't Bring Me Down - ELO
Don't Close the Door - Gerry Rafferty
Don't Cry for Me Argentina - Sinéad O'Connor
Don't Cry Out Loud - Melissa Manchester
Don't Explain - Herbie Hancock
Don't Fade Away - Milla
(Don't Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult
Don't Fence Me In - David Byrne
Don't Fight It - Kenny Loggins
Don't Fight It - Red Rider
Don't Forget Me (When I'm Gone) - Glass Tiger
Don't Forget to Dance - The Kinks
Don't Get Mad, Get Even - Aerosmith
Don't Get Me Wrong - The Pretenders
Don't Give Up - Peter Gabriel
Don't Go - Yaz
Don't Go Breaking My Heart - Elton John and Kiki Dee
Don't Go to Strangers - Joni Mitchell
Don't Interrupt the Sorrow - Joni Mitchell
Don't Leave Me This Way - Thelma Houston
Don't Let Him Know - Prism
Don't Let It End - Styx
Don't Let Me Be Lonely Tonight - James Taylor
Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood - The Animals
Don't Let Me Down - No Doubt
Don't Let Me Go - Billy Squier
Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me - Elton John (also by Oleta Adams and by Roger Daltry)
Don't Make Me Come to Vegas - Tori Amos
Don't Mess with Orgasmatron - DJ Earworm
Don't Pass Me By - The Beatles
Don't Pull Your Love - Hamilton, Joe Frank and Reynolds
Don't Push Your Foot on the Heartbrake - Kate Bush
Don't Put It Down - Hair Soundtrack
Don't Say No - Billy Squier
Don't Say You Love Me - Billy Squier
Don't Speak - No Doubt
Don't Stand So Close to Me - The Police
Don't Stop - Chilliwack
Don't Stop - Olivia Newton-John
Don't Stop - The Rolling Stones
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough - Michael Jackson
Don't Stop Believin' - Journey
Don't Stop Believing - Olivia Newton-John
Don't Stop Me Now - Queen
Don't Stop the Music - Rhianna
Don't Tell Me - Blancmange
Don't Think of Me - Dido
Don't Think Twice, It's All Right - Bob Dylan
Don't Walk Away - ELO
Don't Worry 'Bout Me - Joni Mitchell
Don't You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds

Why the internet is dying...

...advertisers. Sitting, watching, waiting for pages to load. Pages that can't load, won't load, until the streaming video ads load. Time to close that tab. I'm just not interested enough to wait and wait and wait...

I am slowly going crazy
1 2 3 4 5 6 7!
Crazy going slowly am I
7 6 5 4 3 2 1!

L

End of long day

All of my friends who think that I'm blessed
They don't know my head's a mess
No, they don't know who I really am
And they don't know what I've been through...

— Brandi Carlile

The Imperative Playlist

For your mind's ear's aural pleasure!

Be My Girl
Be Near Me
Burn It to the Ground
Bust a Move
Call Me
Don't Stop the Music
Dream On
Evacuate the Dance Floor
Give Me Some Love
Pour Some Sugar on Me

L

nr: _Schooled_ by Gordon Korman
np: "Little Wing" by Jimi Hendrix

How do cats feel about baths?

I love this passage!

It's not that cats don't _like_ baths. It's not that cats have a difficult relationship with baths. It's not that cats chose not to vote for baths in the last election. It's not that cats would rather choose vanilla over baths. It's not that cats neglect to send baths a card on their birthdays. It's not that cats pick baths last when choosing sides for a kick ball game. It's not that cats think about baths in the same way a fire hydrant thinks about dogs. It's not that cats look at baths in the same way that a vegetarian looks at ten pounds of raw liver. It's not that cats once bought baths an awesome present that cost an entire month's allowance, and then baths didn't even have the decency to say "thank you."

It's simply that ...

CATS HATE BATHS!

Despite this warning, if you want to know how to give a cat a bath, read Nick Bruel's Bad Kitty Gets a Bath.

If nothing else, you'll have something to smile about while you heal from the shredding your kitty's going to give you.

L

Meet the iPhone, ca. 1945

Your interesting fact of the day, from an article by Vannevar Bush, 1945, about his proposed device, the memex:

... a device in which an individual stores all his books, records, and communications, and which is mechanized so that it may be consulted with exceeding speed and flexibility. It is an enlarged intimate supplement to his memory.

Apart from the mechanization (which has been supplanted by digitization), Bush foresaw smart phones and similar hand-held devices. He did recognize, though, that computers would be integral to the realization of the memex, which he did not live to see produced.

L

Happy places

Libraries have long been my happy places. Tonight on the Edmonton Public Library site I found these pictures. Good times.

The first image shows one of the ducks from the children's section at the Centennial Library. I miss the ducks! And the iguana!



The second image shows the exterior of the Dickinsfield Library, a location where I spent vast amounts of formative time and where my independence began to grow. On the other end of the mall were chocolate donuts, always an incentive.



These are my happy places; these are my heart songs.

L

For Elephants, Whenever I May Find Them

Back to the grind after a long, long weekend. Gird yourself!

Not once in our history
Has an ant gone out and captured
An elephant single-handedly.

Hafiz; Daniel Ladinsky, trans.

Art and Philosophy

Reading about and looking again at my beloved Klimt. Ahh.


The sun will stand as your best man
And whistle

When you have found the courage
To marry forgiveness,

When you have found the courage
To marry
Love.

— Hafiz; Daniel Ladinsky, trans.

From the mouths of Dusty and Lefty

Dusty and Lefty may be two of most under-appreciated characters in recent film memory, and these lines could be theirs — but they're not. Still, this "cowboy wisdom" should give you a laugh. Enjoy your Saturday!

*

• Don't squat with your spurs on.

• Don't never interfere with something that ain't botherin' you none.

• If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

• Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

• The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.

• Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.

• If it don't seem like it's worth the effort, it probably ain't.

• It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

• The biggest liar you'll ever have to deal with probably watches you shave his face in the mirror every morning.

• Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.

• If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.

• Don't worry about bitin' off more'n you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.

• Always drink upstream from the herd.

• Generally, you ain't learnin' nothin' when your mouth is a-jawin'.

• Tellin' a man to go to hell and makin' him do it are two entirely different propositions.

• Generally speakin', fancy titles and nightshirts are a waste of time.

• Trust everybody in the game, but always cut the cards.

• If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

• If you're gonna go,...go like hell. If your mind's not made up, don't use your spurs.

• Never kick a fresh cowpie on a hot day.

• After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: when you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

• Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.

• When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.

• The best way to have quiche for dinner is to make it up and put it in the oven to bake at 325 degrees. Meanwhile, get out a large T-bone, grill it, and when it's done, eat it. As for the quiche, continue to let it bake, but otherwise ignore it.

• There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.

• When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

• Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.

• Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.

• The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.

• Never miss a good chance to shut up.

At the end of your rope?

Here's a knot to tie and hold on with:

I’ve never understood suicide. I’m a big believer that if things are so bad you’re willing to kill yourself off, you should consider what else you’d be willing to kill first — like a shitty job or a bad relationship or the part of yourself that you’ve been too afraid to change. — Lisa Rosman (for the larger context of this excerpt, go here )

Something to remember when the black dog is baying.

L

Happy Canada Day!

Whee! We're one hundred forty-three years old, and it's one of those unbelievable summer mornings that remind me why I live in a northern town.

Happy to be here,
L

Oscar + me = BFF

Here's a great thought about the ways in which we spend our free time:

It is what you read when you don't have to that determines what you will be when you can't help it. — Oscar Wilde

I guess that explains my inner fifteen-year-old girl!

Getting ready to celebrate,
L

The continuing relevance of booksellers

Clearly acknowledging that he knows nothing of the longer history of publishing and bookselling, Michael Edwards, CEO of US-based book giant Borders, recently said, "the onus is on booksellers to prove their continued relevance in the digital age. If they continue to innovate in the services and experiences they offer and the ways they engage the community, consumers will continue to make bookstores a vital part of their lives. If they fail to adapt to changing market conditions and consumer needs, they'll deserve the empty aisles -- and cash registers -- that result. The next chapter is up to them."

Ah, that's clear. But what's with the us and them rhetoric? Isn't Borders ... a bookstore?

In the last year there has been a noticeable shift in the book industry's panic. Now, with the rise of e-books and e-readers, it's not the book that's dead; it's the bookstore. Consumers don't want to be troubled with the hassle of shopping among other people when they can buy from the sanctity of their homes, and they don't want to have to wait for a physical book when they have so many other screen-based entertainment options available instantly, on a whim. Doesn't help when leaders of the book industry talk junk in the press, though.

Maybe if we stopped insisting on market dominance and started contemplating market stability, market sustenance, we could put an end to the panic. But that's not the way the invisible hand of the market works, is it?

This business of publishing has endured so much over the centuries, and booksellers have been part of the business for most of that time. What if — shockingly — we tried to work together? This crazy idea worked for centuries; it could work again.

Wednesday thoughts

Ah, Wednesday. The mid-way point in the treadmill of the week. So much better when Wednesday represents Friday, no?

And now to the commonplace book:

The absence of the Witch does not
Invalidate the spell —

— Emily Dickinson

L

Me 'n' Jesus used to hang

Note to copyeditors: Quotations within quotations or speech are important. Omitting the interior quotation marks can change the meaning of both expressions.

For example, note the significant difference in meaning in these sentences:

Reverend Warren said, "Jesus said I am the resurrection and the life." (wrong, and now Reverend Warren seems like he's boasting)

Reverend Warren said, "Jesus said, 'I am the resurrection and the life.'" (right)

Just something to consider, anonymous-copyeditor-of-book-I-am-currently-reading. Something to consider.

From the other side

"Oh, with a mind that renders everything sensitive
What chance do I have here?"

— Kate Bush

What a piece of work is a man

"A man is unapologetic, unless he knows you are mad at him, in which case he is busy." — Alison Rosen

Really, quotations like these make me wonder if feminism ever really happened.

L

Good morning, starshine

It's a beautiful spring morning (despite the smoke in the air). Whenever people ask me why I live in Edmonton, mornings like this are the answer.

Last night was the Alberta Book Awards — nice to see everyone, and a great way to wrap up a very long week.

And Happy Birthday to all the Tauruses: here's to the year ahead!

Off to start the day,
L

The rewards of poetry

After a long day at school, one finds something like this:

"How to photograph this,
the dark when one has said
too much. The dark
of sudden feeling. Love's
darkness."

— Anne Michaels, "Fontanelles"

Ahhhh.

The moon and mothers

Looking up again, I saw what has always been,
suspended since time began, for anyone to discover—
God's eternal clue:
the moon in its wet skin of light,
the moon not less in its halfness.

What I learned then sustains me
through every sorrow:
it's the believer who keeps looking for proof.

— Anne Michaels, "A Lesson from the Earth"

Happy Mother's Day!

L

Canadian Children's Books You Should Know

If you've ever read my blog before, you know that I have a little addiction issue with books. B has taken to referring to the near-weekly arrival of books from around the world as my "power-ups." (I like the image of myself as a video-game character!)

Today I read two recently published books for children that I think deserve a little more attention than they're currently getting:

• Mom, What Can Be Done? by Jason Leo Bantle and Lori Nunn
• Theo in the Spotlight by Patti McIntosh

Mom, What Can Be Done? is a photographic picturebook that tries, through verse, to introduce environmental concepts like climate change, habitat loss, and environmental responsibility to young readers. The book is set in the Arctic, using perspectives from various arctic animals to convey the themes of critical climate change and environmentalism. There is clear passion and urgency behind the simple presentation.

Theo in the Spotlight is intended for a slightly older, school-aged audience. In this book, Theo, a "soccer-playing kid," turns social activist by raising money and awareness in his school. (The book builds on an earlier volume by the same author, Ollie's Field Journal: A 9/10ths Happy Story from Africa.) Through the first-person narrative, it steps the reader through the process of setting up a benefit concert, evoking the figure of George Harrison for inspiration.

I am particularly pleased with Theo in the Spotlight and wish it had better reach. However, according to Library Thing, neither of these books is carried by Amazon, and neither one came up in a search through Chapters.Indigo.ca. That's a shame, because children need more books about social activism, social justice, and global awareness.

I've spent the last two weeks immersed in Web 2.0 concepts. This post is, I suppose, my tiny attempt to bring some peer-to-peer exposure to these two deserving books. I'm doing so not just because I love books, especially Canadian books, but because I believe in the missions of these particular books.

So, if you have or know children — early readers or Grades 3 to 4 — who might benefit from greater awareness of global issues, presented in an accessible, attractive way, please consider picking up these books. You can learn more about them here:

• Mom
• Theo

Best of luck, little books!

Postscript: On Friday, 14 May, Theo in the Spotlight won two awards at the Alberta Book Awards. Well deserved!

Reiterative

Learning again that too much is not enough. Too much is not enough. Too much is not enough.

Srsly.

L

Happy birthday!

Happy birthday, Bruce! Here's hoping today's festivities mark a year of happiness, fun, and laughter to come.

love,
Leslie
and
Zak

So glad that's over

The site visit was overall a success. And we finished homicide free: a bonus!

Now back to my regularly scheduled chaos.

L

Poetry Isn't Commonplace

But my blog is. From Apostrophes VI: open the grass.

Whatever you have held —
not roses but the air that they exhale that is a breath inside
your breath — that is the hush that rises there, the sound of it the sound
of nakedness and nothing more, every moment of a life
surrendered then, the asking that is in the light, the stance of trees,
not asking but the what of what we are, birds turning at night.

— E.D. Blodgett, "Turning"

Saturday Poetry

Because no-one can mark for twelve hours in a row!

There are three kinds of teachers, you said.
One who teaches by making you afraid,
one who makes you angry.
The third makes you love him.

— Anne Michaels, "The Day of Jack Chambers"

Eleven Things

This evening I gave my Creative Nonfiction students a very difficult exercise: to write two pages of concrete or demonstrable facts about their individual pasts. I generally try the exercises I ask my students to do, but haven't had time to do many of the exercises for this course. Tonight I thought I'd give this one a go. Here are my first eleven facts.

• I was born in the Royal Alexandra Hospital.

• My maternal grandfather was Scottish and was a fur factor for the Hudson's Bay Company.

• My maternal grandmother was French-Canadian and was a nurse in Manitoba.

• I have one sibling, a brother, who is younger than I am.

• I once learned the entire libretto of "The Pirates of Penzance" by memory.

• My first hamster was named Maurice, after one of the Bee Gees. The hamster was female. I didn't listen to the Bee Gees.

• I was once given detention for writing a personalized verse of the camp song "At the Quartermaster's Store" for each member of my Grade 6 class. I ran into trouble for rhyming with Chris with piss.

• My son was born in the Misericordia Hospital, directly across the street from West Edmonton Mall.

• I learned to slam dance on a choir trip to Saskatoon.

• The first CD I owned was Prince's "Purple Rain". I still have it.

• My first radio was a hand-me-down. It was pink. I no longer have it.

You probably think it's easy to make a list like this. Not so! Give it a try -- and then share it with me!

L

Because I want to remember this

Hello hello,

Such a long time since I've written. But time is beginning to resume its regular course again. In the meantime...

"The hand is a much more reliable and durable instrument than anything that has yet been proposed to replace it." — Robert Bringhurst, January 2010

L

Breakthrough!

Suddenly the reason that I've been teaching mass communications for the last three years snapped into focus.

Look out, doctorate. Here I come.

L

All abuzz

When did you last think about bees? Bees probably aren't top of mind with most people, but they should be. According to Dr Reese Halter, in the last three years more than 50 billion bees have died. This loss affects humanity in many profound ways, perhaps most importantly in that more than one-third of the food we eat depends directly or indirectly on the pollinating work of bees.

What can we do to make the world hospitable to bees once again? Dr Halter provides a list in his charming book, The Incomparable Honeybee and the Economics of Pollination:

• Buy organic foods
• Buy organic cotton
• Buy local, organic honey
• Do not use herbicides, pesticides, fungicides, or miticides in your home garden
• Grow a wide variety of native wildflowers
• Grow a pollinator garden
• Provide a living space for bees in your yard, such as a bee block
• Provide clean water for bees
• Get involved in nature watch and conservation programs.

The international loss of bees has been in and out of the news in the last five years. There is no cause identified at this time, but Dr Halter's book explains some of possible — and possibly intersecting — causes. We are all implicated in the loss of the bees, and therefore we are also all implicated in working for their survival and recovery — and with a few small changes, we can all make a positive difference.

This little gem of a book (you can get it here) is worth your time and attention. Bees — yes, bees — deserve your consideration: now.

L

Good news from the academic world

The paper I proposed for the Book Conference in Switzerland was accepted. Looks like I'm going to give my first international paper in November 2010. w00t!

L

Reading Canadian Living (that'll teach me!)

Am I the only person in the world who finds the Charmin campaign "You can't pass mom's inspection with little white pieces left behind" (involving bears and toilet paper) more than a little sick-making?

Huh. Just me, then.

Strange days indeed.

L

Back to school, day 2

"Suppose someone shot you with an arrow, right in the heart. Would you spend your time screaming at the archer, or even trying to locate him? Or would you try to pull the arrow out of your heart?" — Alice Walker

I guess we'll never know

67 Street & 121 Avenue: Was it the first time our paths crossed?

December, middle of finals

"River" - Joni Mitchell

I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
I wish I had a river so long
I would teach my feet to fly

Sigh.

Music-palooza

Bought a bunch of these old-fashioned thingies called CDs. Woo! Can't wait to dig in.

• Brandi Carlile, Give Up the Ghost: Previewed this on her site after hearing her interview with Jian and it pulled strongly. It's on now and I'm digging it. More songs in the vein of The Story but with new inflections and sounds. I enjoy her register — she's an alto who's not afraid to use the upper range — and the humanness of her singing. Heart-on-sleeve really works for me.

• Metric, Fantasies: Actually a gift from Allia, who calls it one of the best of 2009; other reviews are similarly enthusiastic. I have an on-again, off-again relationship with Metric, so I'm looking forward to hearing this one.

• Imogen Heap, Ellipse: Previewed this on iTunes after watching a video demonstrating Heap's recording process. I love her sound! I enjoyed her previous disc, although it did tend to fade into the background after a few listens. This new one was really yummy in preview — super electronica! Looking forward to this one, too.

• Modest Mouse, Good News for People Who Love Bad News: Hooked by the single "Float On", which always makes me smile. MM has a fanatical following. Perhaps I'm about to become part of it.

• Green Day, 21st Century Breakdown: The first single, "21 Guns", caught my ear and has been on my iPod regularly for the last few months. So few mainstream artists are making anything resembling political music these days. I have hope for this disc — and have deliberately not read any reviews. I want to hear this one fresh.

• MGMT, Oracular Spectacular: Not new — this one came out last year, and I dislike the lead single "Time to Pretend". (That's a great endorsement, right?) But I adore the follow-up singles "Kids" and "Electric Feel", so this one should be OK on balance. Again, Allia strongly recommended this disc, and I have developed faith in her recommendations.

Noe Venable, "The World Is Bound by Secret Knots", "The Summer Storm Journals" and "Down Easy" (as the Noe Venable Trio): On Ecto, the mailing list I am still subbed to after more than a decade, Noe Venable is regularly hailed as an emerging goddess. Her sound is girlish — a high voice, sometimes quite thin and soft, with sensitive lyrics and emotional delivery. Not poppy in any way. These discs have been in the changer for the last three weeks and are growing on me, although I can't say Ms Venable grabbed me instantly. Pleasant, but a little background-y.

Lately I've been into a little more drama in music, a la Marina and the Diamonds. Marina's iTunes singles have been on my iPod almost daily for the last three weeks. I wish I could get the disc in Canada!

I've also been listening to the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' new disc It's Blitz! frequently, although I've had it for a few months. Still have to dive into Grizzly Bear and White Lies, both of which I've also had for a while. But time, you know? Well. These can go into the changer next.

There are few things in this world I cannot resist. Two of them are books and music. And since I'll be pounding the books pretty hard for the next two weeks, I'm glad to have some music to go with them.

L

Just supposin' I'm proposin'

And the thought for today is this:

"... it's hardly surprising that most citizens should increasingly withdraw from public life: why should the practice of citizenship seem worthwhile when politicians and corporations alike seek to infantilize the people, reducing them to consumers confronted with the most trivial of choices?" — Alex Callinicos (The Resources of Critique, p. 253)

Wow!

The vault of lost lyrics, chapter 9

Such a wry and melancholy song.

**

"The Dangling Conversation" (as recorded by Simon & Garfunkel)

It's a still-life water color
Of a now-late afternoon
As the sun shines through the curtained lace
And shadows wash the room
And we sit and drink our coffee
Couched in our indifference
Like shells upon the shore
You can hear the ocean roar
In the dangling conversation
And the superficial sighs
The borders of our lives

And you read your Emily Dickinson
And I my Robert Frost
And we note our place with book markers
That measure what we've lost
Like a poem poorly written
We are verses out of rhythm
Couplets out of rhyme
In syncopated time
Lost in the dangling conversation
And the superficial sighs
Are the borders of our lives

Yes, we speak of things that matter
With words that must be said
"Can analysis be worthwhile?"
"Is the theater really dead?"
And how the room is softly faded
And I only kiss your shadow
I cannot feel your hand
You're a stranger now unto me
Lost in the dangling conversation
And the superficial sighs
In the borders of our lives

The vault of lost lyrics, chapter 51

A wistful voice-and-piano recording. Despite the negative aspect, this song portrays resilience and optimism — important qualities these days.

**

"You Can't Win" (as recorded by Murray McLauchlan)

When the good times come at last
Is only when the bad times rest
Someday they're going to lay you down
Even though you did your best
All the heroes of the wars
Forgotten in the rain
Old soldiers and memories
Make them young again

You can't win
You can't win
You're just someone who plays the fool
You can't win
You can't win
I don't believe that life's so cruel

I'm going to wear my finest suit
Go walk around the town
Strangle out this emptiness
And smash it on the ground
I'm going to watch the faces on the children
While they play
Try and find the child in me
And never have to say

You can't win...

Monday Commonplace

"And what if memory itself is a foreign object which the body longs to be rid of?" — Douglas Glover

Pay attention, people!

This word is pronounced "ca-SHAY". It's spelled cachet. As a noun it refers to prestige.

This word is pronounced "cash". It's spelled cache. As a noun it refers to a hiding place or storage place.

These two words are not the same. Somewhere in the US this morning, a copy editor should be hanging her head for missing this distinction twice on a single page.

Oops.

Having seen this happen, long, long ago...

An excerpt from Jen Lancaster's new book Pretty in Plaid. This passage occurs in the chapter in which she describes wearing her early `80s Jordache jeans:

...When I take them off, my thighs are deeply indented where the seams hit and sometimes I need to punch my legs to regain feeling in them. I'm often forced to lie on the floor and use a rat-tail comb to properly zip them. (They're so tight around the crotch region that I technically may not be a virgin anymore.) ...


Ahem. Some of us used a coathanger. Good times...

The more deceived

Thought for today, courtesy of Adam and the Ants (!)...

"I'm the dandy highwayman so sick of easy fashion
The clumsy boots, peek-a-boo roots that people think so dashing
So what's the point of robbery when nothing is worth taking?
It's kind of tough to tell a scruff the big mistake he's making..."

Rampant with Memory

Just watched an excellent adaptation of Laurence's _The Stone Angel_. If you haven't seen it, it's definitely worth your time — if you can find it. (In the Edmonton area, it's available on DVD from the public library.) One of the reviewers said Ellen Burstyn deserved an Academy award for her performance, and it was indeed admirable. But maybe I'm more apt to respond to a film about mothers and sons. Amazing, though, that one instance of a naked male bottom got it an R rating!

It's been a weekend for movies, actually. Saw the new Harry Potter yesterday — very dense story-telling and painting-like cinematography, I think; I'll have to see it again soon. Maybe it will still be in theatres by the time we're back from France, although that seems unlikely. Apparently the final book will require two films to adapt. Good: more to look forward to!

Also watched _Away from Her_ on Friday afternoon. Hard to believe that was a directorial debut: impressive! I really must look for the short story on which it was based. I know I have lots of Munro packed away somewhere... should unpack it...

Terrible weather right now, after a mild early morning; looks like it could storm at any minute. Last night's storm was electric, wild. But "This is what the world is for / Making electricity."

Adieu.

High praise

"No one ever understood better the art of having grace without affectation, raillery without malice, gaiety without folly, propriety without constraint, and virtue without severity." — a description of a fictional character, Princesse Clarinte, who represents the historical salon hostess Madame de Sévigné, now memorialized by a street in le Marais, Paris

Hope: Leslie Romantic

From a song rather jauntily covered by U2, "Everlasting Love":

Where life's river flows
No-one really knows
'Til someone's there to
Show the way to
Everlasting love
Like the sun it shines
Endlessly it shines
You always will be mine
Eternal love
Whenever love went wrong
Ours will be strong
We have our own
Everlasting love...

(In case you're interested, there are many, many versions of these lyrics on the Net. If you don't agree with my interpretation, look around and you'll probably find a version that suits your hearing.)

Belated happy solstice!

L

And they call it democracy

What does it say about us as citizens — what does it say about the quality of our democracy in Canada — when both our prime minister and the leader of the opposition use an election as a bogeyman? When did our right to vote become something with which to threaten the populace?

This morning CBC quotes Stephen Harper saying, “I don’t want an election. I don’t think anybody wants an election.” Obviously the leader of a minority government, the prime minister only by default, doesn't want to lose his power. But Stephen Harper doesn't speak for me.

Popular wisdom says we get the government we deserve. What have we done to deserve Stephen Harper?

Courtesy of Alberto Manguel

From his delightful and meandering book A Reading Diary: A Year of Favourite Books:

"Instead of saying, 'I seek the meaning of the world,' i.e., the superlative of all superlatives (and the very minute I pronounce the word, I have it, I achieve my purpose merely by having pronounced it), human philosophy has acted like the fool who would run through the streets in tears, looking for his own head on every street corner." — Ladislav Klima

"The person who is really in revolt is the optimist, who generally lives and dies in a desperate and suicidal effort to persuade all the other people how good they are. ... Every one of the great revolutionists, from Isaiah to Shelley, have been optimists. They have been indignant, not about the badness of existence, but about the slowness of men in realizing its goodness." — Chesterton

Red rover or the black dog?

Hmm. Here's something for ya:


Tried flipping through my file of coloured days but couldn't find it. Life swallowing beauty without even chewing. Naming it does not make it go away. Linens, lindens. Roses grow sore from their beauty, and tales are the least one can steal. Breathe deep a wreath of joy, of roses of sweetpeas of gardenias of lilies of holly of rosemary of rue. Meadows of joy where one runs in white linen. The span of his arms the height of me. Prone, supine, lupine. Pining. Liminal and subliminal, the threshold to walk over, the doorway to a new life. Crossed and crossing. Her feet too delicate to touch earth. World of undoing and the undone. Milk vetch. Again and again and again. Inky blue of inconsolable longing, of missing, of loss. Red to die, blue to bring back. Wearing white silk shirts and chambray skirts. Taffeta and crinolines. A hope inside a hoop. A man to walk alongside, the pepper for your salt, the sun for your moon. Fresh-mown grass. Again. Falling and befallen. How does it happen? There was a white haze over the city. Merry, my lord. Do not adjust your set. Do not set your judgement against me. Don't stand so close, so close. Eat the peach, hand extended, fingers quivering. Cherries apples plums roses white never red. The glaring yellow of an angry eye. Lost and lost. I can sense the end. Almost never at a loss for words in my head but cannot make my lips form them. Lies slip so blithely.

A-Plus for Nerdiness

Just got 90 percent on an ABBA trivia quiz. Sigh. To celebrate, iTunes spontaneously found "The Name of the Game" just as I finished the quiz. Apparently computers have a sense of humour after all.

Back to the books!
L

Thursday

She said, A good day ain't got no rain.
She said, A bad day's when I lie in bed
and think of things that might have been.

— Paul Simon, "Slip Slidin' Away"

Whoops!

Forgot the Sarah Slean concert last night at Myer Horowitz. Oops!

Am looking forward to hearing the new Tori Amos. So far, others' reviews are really mixed. Also just received the new Joan Baez (and an old JB as well); looking forward to hearing it, too.

And a kind friend has just sent me a copy of his latest book. Wow! Inscribed and everything! How sweet! Looking forward to reading it ... as soon as I get through the pages and pages and pages of directed reading I still need to finish.

Do you think I can finish my diss in six months? This is the challenge I have set for myself. Well, that and passing my candidacy. The clock is ticking... go!

L

Not en vacances

Feeling comme un poulpe!

Walking in the Super Cities Walk on Sunday. Wish me luck -- and thanks to all who pledged.

L

PS: Happy birthday, Dave!

Maybe I should be tweeting?

Smoking with the ghosts. Back soon.

L

Can't fight the moonlight

Gone to the moon ... back soon!

Little bits

“Robur gregi in lupo, robur lupo in grege.” (The strength of the wolf is in the pack, the strength of the pack is in the wolf.)

Seems right, doesn't it?

In the same batch of e-mail I also learned about preterition (synonyms paralepsis and apophasis): the rhetorical tactic of omitting a topic to emphasize it.

Also very appropriate.

Must read now. Be well!

It's not in the cards

This was an important question that produced an important answer: pay attention.

Traditional Celtic Cross

Significator = Queen of Swords

1. The immediate situation: 4 of Swords: Standing guard: solitude, exile, repose

2. Obstacles: 8 of Cups: Desertion, turning away

3. Aspirations: Strength: The power or courage to act

4. Foundations: 8 of Swords: Bad news: crisis, sickness, conflict

5. The past: 3 of Swords: A pierced heart: absence, delay, division

6. The future: 9 of Wands: Preparation for attack: will, strength in conflict

7. Attitude of the questioner: The Empress: The hidden and unknown: long days, doubt, difficulty

8. Environmental influences: Ace of Wands: The source: origins, creation, invention

9. Hopes and fears: The Sun: Contentment

10. The outcome: The Hermit: Treason, deception, prudence and roguery


Hmm.

The value of poetry in the modern world

According to Publishers Lunch, "Carol Ann Duffy was named the UK's poet laureate, the first woman to hold the position in 341 years. Along with a small stipend, the honor comes with a "butt of sack" -- 600 bottles of sherry to stoke the muse." Avast! A pirate's life for her!

The house I want to buy

Next in my ongoing rant against realtors who insist on working without editors... the home fit for a pirate!

"[This home] is one of the largest at 1,242 sq.ft. has a downtown view with a 27 ft. balcony with duel access."

Whom shall I invite to duel? Jack Sparrow? Zorro? Captain Farrell? Oh, the possibilities are endless. I'll certainly enjoy my 27 ft. balcony. NOT.

And seriously, what's up with the insistence on an initial capital on "Realtor"? Even the spelling checker in my web browser wants the capital! I don't believe "Doctors", "Lawyers", or "Teachers" enjoy that privilege. Perhaps realtors, as para-professionals, have a self-esteem problem and need to compensate by breaking the conventions of English grammar?

Still marking,
L

April 29

Happy birthday, Bruce!

Here's hoping that your day is super-fantastic and that the year ahead brings you everything you want.

love,
Leslie and Zak

A matter of faith

From The Princess Bride

Westley: Hear this now: I will always come for you.
Buttercup: But how can you be sure?
Westley: This is true love. You think this happens every day?

Is it still this week?

A song for the week that won't end...

"The Fly" - U2

It's no secret that a friend is someone who lets you help
It's no secret that a liar won't believe anyone else
They say a secret is something you tell one other person
So I'm telling you...

Overheard at a publishing conference

"Back-end fulfillment" : "Boundary-less delivery of product to buyers in any way they want it, now."

Apparently it's the new way to transact.

Hmmm.

The vault of lost lyrics, chapter 3

Because it's that time of year.

**

"Here's the World" (as recorded by The Payolas)

Here's the world
I can only help you go so far
Try to teach you wrong from right
How to take each day like a brand new day

Don't worry about me
Because who could ever ask for more?
Listen to these words that I write
There will be no tears in my eyes tonight

Don't let them fool you
Don't let them tell you that you'll never go far

Here's the world for you
Here's the world for you
Go tell them who you are
Here's the world for you
Here's the world for you
Go be a shining star

Take all my love
And carry it inside of you
Know that I will always be there
Know that I will always care

Don't let them fool you
Don't let them tell you that you'll never go far

(chorus)

And if I ever did wrong
Please forgive me now
Before I am gone
And if I ever did right
Tell me with a smile
That will light up this night, light up this night

(chorus)

Thought for Friday night

Sans zzz.

"Methought I heard a voice cry, 'Sleep no more!
Macbeth does murder sleep!' the innocent sleep,
Sleep that knits up the ravelled sleave of care,
The death of each day's life, sore labor's bath,
Balm of hurt minds, great nature's second course,
Chief nourisher in life's feast."

$%@*#$!!!

Song for Tuesday

(I was out for dinner and visiting until far too late last night!)

"If I Am a Stranger" - Ryan Adams and the Cardinals

Today is yesterday when you don't know
How to rebuild the walls that someone has knocked down.

Song for Monday

"You'll Always Be" - Oh Susanna

Now I don’t need no tailor to sew this suit together;
your yarn is a worn-out old tether.

Song for today

"Diamonds and Rust" - Joan Baez

But if you're offering me diamonds and rust,
I've already paid.

Hard at work: meta markup

While correcting an exercise in proper mark a new phenom is unveiled. Meta markup. Or as we designers like to refer to it... a dog's breakfast.

It does beg the question of how much can one learn from that many "corrections"

-- Posted a la iPhone

Leslie's Coming Home

Today. Woot. And there's a Rip n Grip. Double woot!


-- Posted a la iPhone

A LibraryThing review

Many of you know that I'm crazy about LibraryThing , a book-cataloguing website that appeals to the book nerd in me.

One of the most fabulous parts of LibraryThing is the Early Reviewers group, which gives away copies of books at or prior to publication in exchange for reviews. There is no requirement that the reviews be laudatory or even positive, and the range of participating publishers is impressive.

Here is my latest review for LibraryThing (also posted in LibraryThing, of course). If you're interested in seeing my profile or my other reviews, you can go here.


According to Their Deeds
Paul Robertson
Bethany House, 2008


According to Their Deeds is a thoughtfully written mystery that draws together Enlightenment and Christian themes. When one of his long-time clients is murdered, gentleman scholar and rare books dealer Charles Beale is pulled into the investigation. Along the way he pauses to consider what mercy, justice, honesty, and integrity mean in a thoroughly modern, bitterly political world.

There are some weaknesses in this telling. The pacing is maddeningly slow; for a suspense novel, the action is far too strung out to create any real tension. And much of the dialogue is preposterous. Mr Beale speaks as though he dropped out of a Jane Austen novel. His attitudes, too, may prove a little too traditional for many readers.

That said, there is some wonderful word play in the writing, and readers will find few literary mysteries quite so literary in their conceits. Readers may feel clever recognizing the many in-jokes and allusions, and numerous puns will have readers either laughing or groaning — or both.

This novel is an interesting hybrid: an inspirational thriller. It should appeal to a range of reading interests.

3/5 stars

Here's a sentence to parse...

... and it provides some helpful career-planning advice, too!

"A career in popping cherries requires few resources beyond audacity, charisma, and a penis." — Hanne Blank, Virgin: The Untouched History

Dissertation work... Really!

Keep you doped with religion and sex and TV
And you think you're so clever and classless and free
But you're still fucking peasants as far as I can see
A working-class hero is something to be...

— John Lennon

Bureaucracy

As in armies so in corporations: unhappiness with an institution can coexist with strong commitment to it; a person, even if generally unhappy, who is given room to make sense of things on his or her own patch becomes bonded to the organization.

— Richard Sennett, The Culture of the New Capitalism

Awesome Rave Playlist

Lovingly hand-crafted for Rave in the Cave, doncha know.

"Crazy" (single mix) - Brooklyn Bounce
"Gimme Freaks" - DJ Earworm (boot)
"She Wants Him" (vocal mix) - Moussa Clark & Terrafunka
"Hung Up" (radio edit) - Madonna
"Maniac" (remix) - Michael Sembello
"Flashdance" - Deep Dish
"Adagio for Strings" - DJ Tiësto
"Blue Monday" - New Order
"Call on Me" (radio edit) - Eric Prydz
"Dance Your Pain Away" - The Moon Whispers
"Boo in Love" - DJ Tripp (boot)
"Barbie Girl" - Rob Mayth (Candy Boyz vs Klubbstylerz Remix)
"Spin Me Harder" - DJ Tripp (boot)
"Brand New Lover" - Dead or Alive
"Zombie" - Andrew Spencer and the Vamprockerz (Ray Knox Hands Up Extended Club Remix)
"Blue (Da Ba Dee)" - Eiffel 65
"Caramelldansen" - Caramell
"God Is a DJ" - Dutch Trance Force (DJ Cobra Mix)
"Chase" - Giorgio Moroder
"Sweet Dreams" - Overdub featuring Sophia (Doug Laurent Bonzai Mix)
"I'm Too Sexy for Sex" - DJ Roy Batty (boot)
"What Is Love" - Haddaway
"You Keep Me Hangin' On" - Kim Wilde
"Flashdance ... What a Feeling" - Irene Cara (Adam Van House Mix)
"Enjoy What You Do" - Mac Murphy (Disco Filter House Radio Edit)
"Hyperactive!" (12-inch mix) - Thomas Dolby
"Dragostea Din Tei" - O-Zone (DJ Rosse Extended Remix)
"Precious" - Depeche Mode
"Born to be Alive" - DJ Team
"Situation" (US 12-inch mix) - Yaz
"I Kissed a Girl" - The Real Booty Babes (Club Radio Edit)
"Billie Jean Is a Spy" - DJ Tripp (boot)
"Don't Stop the Music" - Rihanna
"Sandstorm" - Tunnel Alliance

As mixed, this playlist runs to approximately 150 minutes of aural goodness.

My new year's tarot

Based on a modified Celtic cross spread

1. The significator: Queen of Swords
2. The problem, antagonist, or obstacles: The Empress
3. The foundation: King of Pentacles
4. The crown: 4 Pentacles
5. The near past: 6 Pentacles
6. The near future: Page of Wands
7. Attitude toward question: 3 Pentacles
8. Environment or influences: Page of Swords
9. Hopes and fears: 10 Swords
10. Outcome of the reading: Knight of Swords

I feel this spread represents triumph after considerable struggle (look at all those swords!). I have ample material resources for the task; my major struggle will be with the contradictory qualities of my own character. But note that the outcome card signals success: bravery, strength, a skillful and clever person, arrival. I'm reading this as an encouraging sign for the year ahead — if nothing else, it's much more positive than last year's spread!

Bad poems for sale

Because I could not stop the puck
It kindly stopped for me:
The crease held but just ourselves
And immortality.

Ha ha.

L

Stand by Me

Marcy sent this to me on Facebook. I love the concept and its a great rendition of this song...

Embedded Video

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Does Any One Know Any Thing?

Today's title is in honour of editors, one of whom would likely change my titling to "Does Anyone Know Anything?" — sadly, quite different in intent than my original.

Apparently today, on the eve of the solstice, we are enjoying the halcyon days. Michael Quinion provides an explanation:

The story goes back to a Greek legend that the kingfisher nested in
the sea at the time of the winter solstice and that its floating
nest brought calm to wind and water, what we now call the halcyon
days, "halcyon" being from the Greek name for the kingfisher,
alkuon. A romantic version of the legend was told by the Roman poet
Ovid about Ceyx and Alcyone. She was the daughter of Aeolus, the
god of the winds, and he was the son of the morning star. Ceyx was
lost at sea and Alcyone was inconsolable. The gods took pity on
them, turning them into kingfishers so that they might continue to
live together. When they mated each year at the winter solstice the
gods calmed the winds and seas so Alcyone might brood her eggs
safely. Alcyone's name became "halcyon" in Latin, because of a mistaken
belief that its real source was two Greek words meaning "conceiving
on the sea."

It's difficult to imagine a seascape populated with kingfishers this morning, with the air temperature at -29 and the wind chill equivalent to -33. Still halcyon, meaning peaceful, calm, carefree, is an emotional tone we should all strive for this weekend. The sun is about to begin its return journey: the light is coming back.

Too bad there are only five more shopping days until Christmas. Perhaps that's why truly halcyon days seem so remote and fantastic.

Soon to emerge from under a pile of marking...

L

Shakespeare was a Wild Thing

My online grammar students are required to do a style analysis exercise in which they must recast a piece of contemporary writing in an older idiom. Their choices are Middle English, Renaissance English, Enlightenment English, and Victorian English. The students protested that they had no idea what I was asking them to do — did I really expect them to learn Middle English in a week? — and could I please post a sample of the task.

Normally I am reluctant to provide well-developed models of assignments in class because students tend to do what I've shown them rather than developing their own, likely much more creative, solutions. However, I decided that because we are meeting in an online environment and they have much less contact with me than they would in a face-to-face setting, I would relent. Hence the following excerpt from Maurice Sendak's classic children's book Where the Wild Things Are, recast in Renaissance-style English. Enjoy! — L


***


The night Max wore his wolf suit and made mischief of one kind
and another
his mother called him "WILD THING!" and Max said "I'LL EAT YOU UP!" so he was sent to bed without eating anything.
That very night in Max's room a forest grew
and grew ——
and grew until his ceiling hung with vines and the walls became the world all around
and an ocean tumbled by with a private boat for Max and he sailed off through night and day
and in and out of weeks and almost over a year to where the wild things are.
And when he came to the place where the wild things are they roared their terrible roars and gnashed their terrible teeth
and rolled their terrible eyes and showed their terrible claws
till Max said "BE STILL!" and tamed them with the magic trick of staring into all their yellow eyes without blinking once and they were frightened and called him the most wild thing of all
and made him king of all wild things.



Lo, upon that eve, when upon his person did Max array the suit in the likeness of the Wolf, and did make mischief of such a kind and of another such;
his Mother, the very Hera of his being, him appelled "WILD THING!"; the while sayeth Max, "I'LL EAT YOU UP!" and so, thus was he returned to his chamber lacking entirely in victual and sustenance.
Lo upon that same eve'n, in that fast foreboding chamber, did grow a wood and a wild, the which unfurled
and increased ——
and expanded vitally until the firmament was wreathed with tendrils and tenerumen, and the ramparts gave way to a Universe new-emerged;
and there upon the waves of fair Okeanos did tumble a sailing vessel bold, for the express conveyance of Max alone; and so he did voyage, tracing the pathways of fair Diana and bright Apollo both,
through the reckoning of a seven-day and beyond a fortnight, nigh upon one turning of the stars, to discover the place of the Wilde Things.
Whereupon encountering the horde of these Creatures Beastly, did they bellow, their shouts a clatter upon the Heavens; and did they grind their beastly dentures, a boisterous and disorderly shewing;
They did roll their eyen frightful upon themselves, and did brandish their talons and their pincers set to maul and mangle;
And then, of a sudden did Max proclaim "BE STILL!" and brought these beasts of wildest mantle under his own sway and suasion, using that charm magick, the enchantment of staring but fierce into their orbs aureal and not to break the thread he had made with those fearsome orisons; and they were afeared and did cower and quake, and unto him did apply the title of that one most wild of any,
And so did they make him Ruler and King of all their kind.

Why proofreading matters

How different life can be plus or minus a consonant:

timelines or timeliness?

deadlines or deadliness?

This week I can't tell the difference.

L